Greener Grass
In 2017 my wife and I moved from Denver to Vail, Colorado. It had long been a dream of ours to live in a mountain town and after calling Denver home for five years, we found new jobs, made the big move, and made our dream a reality.
In my previous life, metropolitan living always appealed to me with the organic sense of energy, culture, and diversity that residing in a city can provide. But in recent years, urban life has also become more problematic. Some of the cities I have called home for years (Portland, Seattle, San Diego, and Denver) have become rampant with homelessness, drug use, crime, traffic, and a skyrocketing cost of living. There’s also the seeming ineptness of many city governments to address these issues.
Just blocks from where we lived in downtown Denver, there were masses of tents set up on city sidewalks surrounded by garbage and filth. We commonly witnessed aggressive panhandling, scenes of horrific drug abuse, and abject poverty. A few years ago on her morning walk to work, my wife came across a homeless man masturbating in front of her. The summer before we left Denver, I witnessed a woman in her underwear leaning up against our building with a needle still sticking out of her arm. And that was city life before 2020. It was time to get out of Dodge.
Many of our great cities have been in crisis in recent years, but now cities have also been particularly hit by the current global pandemic (not to mention mass demonstrations and civil unrest). Especially given that many people can now work remotely, living in a community like mine seems like a no-brainer.
Fleeing the problems of city life wasn’t the impetus for our move to the mountains, but it certainly was a factor. When I walk in my neighborhood now, instead of homelessness, piled up garbage, and discarded needles, I’m surrounded by the serenity of vast forests and clean mountain air. Our new home isn’t immune from problems, but I must admit Vail has been a pretty nice place to ride out 2020.
My personal greener grass narrative is not a unique story. Especially this year, people have been flocking to communities like mine in droves. In some cases they are literally showing up with suitcases of cash to make their escape plans a reality. Protecting your family and moving to higher ground or a safer address seem like prudent solutions, but recently I have started questioning if “getting out of Dodge” really solves anything.
Most don’t have the option of just leaving their jobs and communities or the means of simply picking up and moving to a place like Vail. I’ve also learned many times in life that the grass isn’t always greener as the old adage states. Speaking from personal experience, a change of address won’t protect you from past mistakes, inoculate you from future set backs, or heal a broken heart.
Living in Vail also won’t insulate you from inequality, drug and alcohol abuse, and homelessness. Living in the mountains won’t protect you from COVID or even civil unrest. In fact, with a one-dimensional economy based on tourism, the immense cost of living, and the massive divide between have and have not’s, life in Vail is potentially just as precarious as it is in urban San Francisco or New York.
The fact of the matter is our whole society is ailing, not just certain geographic locations. While parts of our country do seem sicker than others, moving won’t help change the spread of the deadly diseases we’re facing.
The pandemic we’ve been living with this past year is obviously a disease. But so are the addictions of social media, gambling, and pornography that have been steadily rising in recent years. So are the drug and alcohol epidemics that have been raging for the past 20 years. So is the obesity epidemic that has been growing for the past 30 years. So are disparities of wealth, wage stagnation, corporate greed, and a system that favors the powerful that has been growing for the past 40 years. So are the abhorrent qualities of racism and narcissism that have been part culture for hundreds of years.
These are sicknesses that we have collectively perpetuated and we are all ultimately responsible for addressing them. These cancerous problems are growing everywhere, and it’s going to take all of us to solve them. Just blaming the “other side” solves nothing and frankly neither will moving to Texas, the mountains, or the beach.
For decades we’ve touted individual responsibility as the solution to our dilemmas while blatantly ignoring corporate irresponsibility and allowing the ineptitude of government. We’ve imprisoned millions and have declared wars on terrorism, crime, poverty, drugs, and fat only to make most of these issues far worse. Our response to the problems we face seems to be “everyone for themselves.” You don’t like being poor - get a job. You don’t like being addicted - stop using. You don’t like being heavy - start exercising. You don’t like your city – move.
And how’s that working for us?
Sicknesses don’t heal without addressing the root causes. There isn’t a vaccine for contempt, a magic cure for inequality, or a drug cocktail for racism. Shoving the unpleasant filth of homelessness to another location or putting drug users in jail does not eradicate the disease. A “can do” attitude doesn’t treat the gaping wounds of our nation’s crises of mental health, addiction, and inequality.
I’ve moved cities, states, and changed careers multiple times. I am a living testament that the grass isn’t always greener. I’ve learned the hard way that healing begins with both radical humility and brutal honesty. Healing begins with the ability to listen, the courage to speak out, and the willingness to stand up. Healing begins by expressing love and creating community.
Greener grass doesn’t start with a change of address, but a shift of consciousness.